Last August 1st of 2015, my mother was diagnosed with bone cancer. One year later, she is doing well BUT yesterday, August 3rd, my oldest daughter found out she has cancer. I'm sick to my stomach. I know in my heart that she will pull through but this hurts....a lot. She's only 27 and I cannot understand why this would happen to someone so young who has so much more to do. She was making plans to move back to be closer to me but obviously this is on hold for now as her health is more important. I hate that we are so far away...sigh. She will get through this, we all will but I tell ya, I wasn't ready, wasn't ready for this at all.
My body is numb. We will make the 8 hour trip today so that I can be with her for her appointment tomorrow but right now, I wish I was there when she got the news so I could just hold her. She has her boyfriend who loves her dearly and for that, I am grateful. I cannot imagine her having to go through this alone.
I have to snap out of this though. I pray I don't lose it when I see her, with all the crying I've been doing already.
I know God only gives you what you can handle...man, this is hard, real hard.
**I never finished this post. My mind was all over the place. Today is actually January 12, 2017, 5 months after her diagnosis. I am thankful that she has finished chemotherapy however, she is not out of the woods yet. This month she will have a double mastectomy (removal of both breasts). Her breast specialist felt that was the best option due to one of the lumps being so close to the chest wall and not being able to be removed during the lumpectomy when they found the cancer. Sigh.
I knew I was strong but I didn't know how strong I was until this. I also found out how strong my daughter is and that makes me proud and so very grateful. She mentioned that she didn't think she could handle it once she started chemotherapy but she knew she had to. It's been rough. There have been days when she has called me at work in tears. Other days are like any other day, with a pain and/or stomach issues from chemo thrown in, but otherwise just like any other day.
I have had made many trips to be with her and of course will be going back for this surgery. We are looking forward to the day when this is all behind her and she can go from being a breast cancer patient to Survivor! The picture below was taken during her first chemo session. Her physical appearance has changed so much. Her mental being has changed so much but she is still the smart and beautiful young lady I have always known...but different, stronger, far more resilient.
We never know why we are strapped with such tasks of illness. Thankfully we are on the recovering end.
**I'm still not ready to post this. Sigh. Again, my mind is all over the place so I will save this and come back later. Thank you for understanding.
**August 23,2020 - 4 years post diagnosis. Clearly, I still haven't posted this so I guess it's time for an update. She's doing extremely well and finished all of her surgeries this past January. She still gets tired and still has chemo-brain but she's good nonetheless. She never made the move back to Georgia but that's okay. She actually likes where she lives and I'm less than 2 hours away by plane so I'll take that for now.
**March 25, 2021 - I'm not sure why I keep coming back to this post but I do. Anyway, the kid is doing well. When this Covid-19 pandemic hit, I was concerned. We are a year into it and she hasn't gotten sick. She's working from home, like most of us that have the option, while still trying to have a bit of a social life. Maybe it's time to post this. Yep, it's time.
~Pamela Denise~
**November 30, 2025 - So much has changed since this post. The kid is doing amazing. She's no longer just a daughter, she's somebody's mama! (I probably updated one of my other posts about this but whatever). I love that for her. She has a toddler and she is the sweetest, most independent little girl. She's amazing and my daughter is an amazing mom. I'm happy.
